3/15/11

MOVIE REVIEW: Battle: Los Angeles (14A)

WARNING: THIS MOVIE HAS A LOT OF VIOLENCE AND SWEARING.

STORY:
There appears to be thousands of meteors heading toward the Earth, and looks like they're going to smash into several cities but then they realize that they're not meteors they are UFOs! And they are coming to blow up the Earth and take our resources.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
The film shows the value of human life, as the squad puts themselves on the line to protect the civilians. Several times Nantz is willing to strike out on his own to draw away the alien fire, and a civilian and his son go over personally to Nantz to thank him for saving them and the rest of the civilian. A civilian bravely picks up a gun and shoots it at as many aliens as he can.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
None

SEXUAL CONTENT:
Some of the platoon members joke about a comrade's virginity. A Marine cracks a sexual joke after a female soldier is splashed with a dying alien's bodily fluids.

VIOLENT CONTENT:
Battle LA is pretty much one firefight after one firefight, with humans vs. whatever the aliens can think up.

A Marine is shot through his helmet, and we see the burning and bleeding results. Dead bodies litter the streets. A man's skin is crisped and cracked by fire. A helicopter full of the wounded is blown to smithereens—sending the dead and large chunks of shrapnel flying in all directions.

Perhaps the goriest scene takes place when Nantz determines to find a way to kill the seemingly indestructible enemy. He finds a wounded alien and, with the aid of a civilian veterinarian, begins to cut and stab into the creature, exposing its internal organs and searching for a weak point. After several gooey and spurting attempts, they finally hack into the creature's heart and it gurgles its last.

Armored vehicles smash through groups of aliens, crushing them beneath their wheels. A dying Marine detonates a bag full of C4, igniting a bus's fuel tank and tearing the vehicle (and surrounding enemies) to pieces. Several soldiers bury the barrels of their weapons inside a large enemy before unloading clips of ammo.

PROFANITY:
Two f-word. About 35 s-words. Twenty or so uses of "hell" Over a dozen each of "d‑‑n" and "a‑‑." About 4 uses each of "b‑‑ch" and "b‑‑tard." God's name is misused well over 20 times.

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
One Marine gets so drunk he vomits, and partyers down bottles of beer and other alcohol, too.

CONCLUSION:
If you loved 'Independence Day' and/or '2012' you'll love this movie, the movie had the best effects I've seen since 'Transformers'. Unfortunately; it has a bad camera, and it seems to go on a little too long. But I give it 2.5 stars out 5.

2/12/11

GAME REVIEW: LEGO Batman (E10+)

STORY:
Batman's villains have escaped from Arkham Asylum, and they're running around Gotham City to finish their plans and only one person can stop them. The Batman.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
Batman and Robin run around trying to save the day, and Batman never kills any of the major villains.

GAMEPLAY:
What you're going to be doing when you use Batman and crew, you'll punch, kick and throw your way though each level until the end. but when you play on the villain side you'll have to solve a few puzzles along the way, and occasionally there is a 'vehicle level' where all you do is drive and shoot.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
In the Joker episodes, the final showdown with him takes place at a cathedral.

SEXUAL CONTENT:
Poison Ivy shows up in an outfit that looks entirely made out of nothing but leaves, and Catwoman shows up and during every cutscene she's in makes anything she does 'interesting'. Catwoman kisses Batman for a long time after he finishes fighting her, but they're all LEGO minifigs so there's nothing too odd.

VIOLENT CONTENT:
Batman’s known to be quite a martial-artist, and he still carries a bit of that into the LEGO world, limited as it is. He and Robin attack with punches and a kick or two. They can also grab enemies and either hit them or throw them. Since this is all with LEGO figures, the enemies just literally go to pieces. Some bad guys bring guns into the fight, but the result is still the same as it is when combat is hand-to-hand. You have to punch the female enemies to get rid of them, which may upset a couple of players.

PROFANITY:
none

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
The Joker use a joy buzzer that zaps his enemy into skeletons until they break apart, Scarecrow uses something called 'fear gas' to make his enemies see their worst fears and when you use it they curl up into a ball. Then there are a couple of goons in some of the levels that try to get a girl to kiss them, that is until you get rid of them.

CONCLUSION:
If you can get past the fact that it's darker than any of the other LEGO games so far, and that though half of the game you don't have any weapons. You'll realize that Traveler's Tales fixed up what was wrong with LEGO Star Wars II, and made a very fun game. I give it a total of 4 out of 5 stars.

2/3/11

MOVIE REVIEW: Aliens vs Predator (14A)

WARNING: This movie has a ton of violence in it.

STORY:
A squad of scientists and archaeologists arrives in Antarctica to investigate a strange pyramid that was found underground unknown to them, inside the pyramid is a nest of Aliens that are waiting for other aliens called the Predators to come and start the war.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
The explorers are led by environmentalist and expert ice climber Alexa Woods. She’s brave and loyal. She’s also the voice of reason who thinks it foolish to run headlong into the potentially dangerous unknown out of pride and greed. One of her colleagues courageously saves her life, only to lose his in the process. (SPOILER) A Predator shows mercy to a man with a weak heart who is not deemed a threat.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
none

SEXUAL CONTENT:
none

VIOLENT CONTENT:
One man gets stabbed in the stomach by huge, retractable claws which emerge, bloodied, through his back. A man hides while watching a Predator walk right by him, next thing you know another Predator shows up behind him and stabs him off-screen (you see blood fly onto the snow). A Predator slices a 'face-hugger' into two, and also snaps a newborn alien's neck. The Aliens get brutal, too. Newly hatched face-huggers leap onto the faces of their victims and dispatch an Alien embryo into the person’s esophagus. Those critters grow until they eventually burst forth from their living hosts’ abdomens. A woman writhes in pain, torso bulging (the camera cuts away just as the Alien emerges). Alexa shoots one of her colleagues to spare him the agony of “giving birth.” A full-grown Alien penetrates the skull of a Predator, killing it. On several occasions they drive their sharp tails through the bodies of their enemies. In a flashback, swarms of Aliens and Predators fight each other until a nuclear-size blast annihilates everything.

PROFANITY:
Alexa uses the f-word once, and starts to say “mutha------” before the second half of the obscenity gets drowned out and also she uses the b-word. There are also about seven s-words and a few milder profanities.

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
none

CONCLUSION:
If you don't mind seeing a load of action and a bit of blood and if you can find the 'mute' button before the f-bomb comes on this is the movie for you, I give this movie 3 out of 5 stars.

12/18/10

GAME REVIEW: Marvel Ultimate Alliance (T)

STORY:
A squad of superheroes go to save a giant hover-ship from it's destruction, and find a big problem created by Doctor Doom.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
The superheroes go to save the universe from all the evil-doers who wish to do it harm, and they also go to the Skrull homeworld to save them from Galacticus even though they tried to conquer the Earth several times. Uatu also helps the heroes even though it will mean that his powers are stripped away temporarily, and Senator Kelly (who hates mutants and meta-humans) after being saved; starts to think that maybe he was wrong about them.

GAMEPLAY:
Pretty much the only thing that you'll be doing in the game is pushing the X button to attack your opponents. There are a bit of puzzles, but most of them are solved rather easily.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
Doctor Strange, Ghost Rider and Thor show up on your superhero roster, and use their magic to stop Doom's lackeys. There is also a world called Mephisto's Realm, that looks a lot like Hell and has demons show as the enemies. And Mephisto himself looks like a giant version of the devil. And you also have to go to Asgard and help to rescue Odin, Asgard looks like you're on another planet instead of in heaven.

SEXUAL CONTENT:
Girls show up in their comic book outfits and most of them are a bit skin-tight, and both Elektra's and Storm's costumes show quite a bit of skin.

VIOLENT CONTENT:
The only thing that you do in the game is attack your enemies until they fade away, and leave red and blue orbs that you can use for your health and power. During Mephisto's Realm you will have to fight Demon Leapers that jump on the back of your characters, and try to bite the character's neck.

PROFANITY:
Nick Fury says hell about four times during the game, damn also shows up a couple of times.

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
Near the end of Mephisto's Realm, you have to pick what hero you're going to save; Nightcrawler or Jean Gray, and when you save one the other will fall to the ground and disappear for the rest of the game. There is also another time when to free Ghost Rider you have to sacrifice one of the members of your team to set him free, but you get him/her back afterward.

CONCLUSION:
If you like games where you just hit the same button over and over again, then this game is for you. It is fun when it begins but when you realize it's the same throughout the game, you start to hope that the game ends soon. I give this game a 1.5 out of 5 stars.

11/30/10

MOVIE REVIEW: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows part I (PG-13)

STORY:
Harry finds himself hunted by Death Eaters, and he must find the other Horcruxes before he's found by Lord Voldemort.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
Ron and Hermione help Harry no matter the size of the problems he faces, and Harry's other friends take a potion to look like him to act as decoys from the Death Eaters. And after the death of a friend, he gives him a proper funeral with out any use of magic. Dobby once again saves Harry Potter from the clutches of evil, and Ginny asks Harry why they're holding a wedding during all of the attacks by Voldmort; Harry's reply is that they must hold on to good things like weddings and family.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
Magic is abundant here, wizards and witches use magic for pretty much everything; reading a will, using it as a weapon, and making protective barriers. Not as much magic is used like the other Harry Potter films however.

SEXUAL CONTENT:
Ginny asks Harry to zip up the back of her dress for the wedding, and the audience sees quite a bit of her back and they later kiss. After Fleur take the transforming potion, "Harry" is wearing a bra for a second. After they open one of the Horcruxes, a ghastly monster comes out and shows Ron, a vision of Harry and Hermione kissing passionately and later naked even though steam clouds cover most of them it's still a pretty freaky shot. Harry takes off his clothes excluding his underwear to dive into icy water for something. After Hermione takes the potion, she tells Harry that he's much tastier than Crabbe and Goyle and then says 'Oh, you know what I mean!' (She drank the potion for Crabbe in the second movie)

VIOLENT CONTENT:
There are loads of battles between Harry and Voldemort's henchmen, the first battle starts in the sky and goes on for a quite a bit. The battle takes a couple of Harry's friends, and we later see one of his friends ear cut off and blood covering his neck. Another attack claims the life of a friend who's on the receiving end of a thrown knife. And in still another melee, Ron's arm gets badly shredded by an enemy. Arguably more disturbing than these scenes are several that imply torture and cold-blooded murder. A sobbing teacher is suspended above the table where Voldemort and his lackeys strategize. In the end, Voldemort 'shoots' and kills her with his wand, and his giant snake, Nagini—it's implied—eats her. (The snake shows up in another frantic battle as well.) There's a incredible chilling scene were Hermione screams while Bellatrix carves the word "MUDBLOOD" into her arm. We don't witness the cutting, but we see its bleeding results. Harry sees plenty of small shots with Voldemort killing/torturing people. And in the animated 'Three Brothers' one of the brothers gets stabbed but you don't see the actual stabbing just a knife above his shadow, and another brother hangs himself.

PROFANITY:
Moody says that the potion will taste like goblin p---, and the words hell and damn shows up once or twice.

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
In the 'Three Brothers' Death looks like something from a Tim Burton movie, the monstrous creature from one of the Horcruxes looks rather freaky as well. The audience sees quite a bit of blood throughout the movie, and when during the opening scene Nagini's mouth is shown open and looks it ate the camera. In a sad scene; Hermione erases all the memories and pictures of herself from her parents.

CONCLUSION:
If you don't mind quite a bit of violence, this will make the perfect movie for teens and adults. I give it 5 stars out of 5

9/24/10

GAME REVIEW: Star Wars The Clone Wars: Republic Heroes (T)

STORY:
The game is set between season 1 and 2 of the TV show: The Clone Wars, it starts with Anakin and his new padawan Ahsoka searching the planet Ryloth for separatist droids. They later find themselves involved into a larger plot orchestrated by Count Dooku's latest minion named Kul Teska.

GAMEPLAY:
The gameplay is basically involving Jedi using their lightsabers to cut up droids and taking down pretty boring bosses, and then theirs Clones who uses their blasters, grenades, mega-blasters, and sometimes even their bare fists to destroy droids.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
Jedi and Clones risk their lives to defeat the separatists, and Obi-Wan tries to turn Dooku back to the good side. (SPOILERS) Anakin and Ahsoka go to save Senator Padme, even though they could have just left her behind.

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
The Force is used during the game, but is basically just used as a tool instead of belief.

SEXUAL CONTENT:
Ahsoka wears her usual outfit showing off her stomach, and Ventress shows up with her outfit that exposes a bit of cleavage. And Padme shows up in her Episode II pre-ripped outfit.

VIOLENT CONTENT:
It's all about killing droids with your lightsaber or blaster, but after a droid would get killed it would just break apart and disappear after awhile. But after you finished fighting the bosses most of time they just vanish.

PROFANITY:
nothing

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
After your first fight with Kul Tuska, he unexpectedly smashes against the door which may frighten kids. Kul Tuska says that he will kill the Jedi slowly.

CONCLUSION:
It's a pretty fun game that doesn't take that long to beat it, but you could go back and then get the artifacts but they don't really do anything. Playing as the Jedi got really boring after playing as them almost through the whole game, but when you play as the clones it's pretty fun to play as them but it can be kinda hard to get a hang of using the weapons. I give this game 3 out of 5 stars.

8/3/10

MOVIE REVIEW: Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (PG-13)

STORY:
It's 45 years after The Last Crusade in the films, and Indy still getting himself into deep trouble but instead of the Nazis, he finds himself in the hands of communists.

POSITIVE ELEMENTS:
Indiana has learned a couple words of wisdom, and gives them to Mutt for example: Fixing motorcycles for a living is fine as long as you truly love it. Indy tells Mutt to be nicer to his mom because 'You only get one, and sometimes not for that long.' It is shown that you shouldn't be greedy or else, Indy also tells someone that 'To be a good archaeologist, you gotta get out of the library.'

SPIRITUAL ELEMENTS:
since I don't want to spoil the movie for people who haven't seen it, I'll just say that near the end of the movie there are talks about gods.

SEXUAL CONTENT:
You see Indy naked in a radiation-banishing shower from his waist-up being scrubbed by people in radiation suits.

VIOLENT CONTENT:
There's quite a bit of violence in this movie, however if you were fine with the violence in the other movies you will be fine. There is a time where one of the villains get eaten by giant ants, but nothing is shown happening but ants swarming all over his body and into his mouth. There is a sword fight between Mutt and Irina, and Indy gets into a multitude of fights. Mutt gets smacked in the crotch many times. (SPOILER) At the end, Irina's eyes burst into fire, and she becomes sand and disappears into the spaceship.

PROFANITY:
Shia (Mutt) uses his favorite word; the s-word a couple of times though not as much as Transformers. People say son of a b----- a little bit, and some other milder words.

OTHER NEGATIVE ELEMENTS:
A couple of teens race against a truck, in the wrong lane.

CONCLUSION:
This was one of the best movies I have seen for a while, the only problems I found was the swearing and the ants. So I'll give it a 3 out of 5.